LID

Are you thinking "Here she goes again with the adoption acronyms?" 

 

We have LID.  What exactly does that mean?  That means that all of the paperwork that China needs to formally approve us as Kyle's parents has been received and recorded by China.   

Our dossier (fancy name for collection of documents) was sent to China on 4/8/2013.  This is the collection of papers we've been working on since we made the decision to add Kyle to our family right after the first of the year. We were able to get this together in relatively short order since most of it is the same dossier that was used for Zack's adoption. 

We had to have an updated social worker's report and an updated approval from the Department of Homeland Security, which took us from mid-January to early April to gather and authenticate.  All documents sent have to be authenticated by the Chinese Consulate and the Secretary of State, which is time consuming and expensive. 

All things considered, we've had a relatively seamless process...so far.  So what now?  We wait for China to issue us a "Letter Seeking Confirmation" or, as it's known in adoption circles as "Letter of Approval or LOA"...don't ask me why.  This stage of the process took us 62 days last year, from LID to LOA.  The forums I've been following now are showing a little bit of a faster trend at this time.  There have been more than a few families who have gotten their LOAs in the thirty-ish day range. 

So...next step is the LSC/LOA.  After that, another round of Homeland Security approval.  We're still well on track for summer travel to China and we're cautiously optimistic that we'll be able to be home with Kyle before our one-year "Gotcha Day" anniversary for Zack.  Any wrinkle, snag, or unexplained wait at any of the other wickets that we still have to get through could delay us, though. 

Keep your fingers crossed, keep us in your thoughts & prayers, wish us good vibes & good karma...whatever is your thing, we appreciate you thinking of us. 

Our Adoption Necklace

So.  I'm not super comfortable with the idea of adoption fundraising.  A friend of mine in the adoption community suggested I get in contact with her friend Stacy Richards, who was in the business of designing fundraising pieces for adopting families.  I went on her site, liked what I saw and contacted Stacy at Jubilee's Jewels for details.  The deal was that I would help design a necklace that would be sold on Stacy's site.  I would of course be free to direct people to her site.  For every one of "my necklaces" she sold, an agreed upon portion would go to our family's adoption fund.  Too easy, right? 

Now, I have never considered myself a jewelry designer.  I will say that Stacy's "style" is very in line with what I like.  I gave her some ideas of things I liked and then I was asked to give three words that describe our family and our adoption.  I laughed at that.  Obviously Stacy didn't know me very well because brevity...well, that just isn't my thing.  But...coming up with three words to describe our family was surprising easy.

#1:  Community. 
This means many things to me.  This means the place where I live, sure.  But it means much more than that.  Being in the military means we are transient for most of our career life.  We're not in our same home town.  We're not near our family.  This means friendship takes on an extra special significance...and we have made (and said goodbye to) many great people over our combined 46 years of service.  Yeah...I know that's a lot.  Yikes.  Community means my military community and the people I serve with every day.  I may not personally know all of them.  I may not like all of them...but they are my community and that is an important part of my life.  And last...the adoption community.  There is a special bond amongst parents who make the choice to adopt, especially those who choose to adopt internationally.  If you don't know this first hand...TRUST ME when I say endless months of paperchasing, waiting, nail biting, stress eating and talking in crazy code words like dossier, apostille and lockbox bonds you to people you've never met and offers a very unique sense of community. 

#2:  Service. 
A large part of my identity is tied up in my military service. It's a "subculture" if you will that I've been immersed in for the past almost 23 years...yeah...I know.  That's a long time and I'm old.  Actually, I like seasoned better.  Service to my country and service to others is...well, it is who I am, at least its a lot of who I am.  But when I say service, I don't just mean that.  I am who I am because of my experiences serving my country, sure.  But I also am who I am because of my committment to serving my community.  I've always been a volunteer for some sort of something throughout my adult life.  I've taught Sunday school, been a Girl Scout leader, helped build playgrounds, painted schools, organized bake sales, yard sales, burger burns, walked dogs who live in the animal shelter...you name it.  I've done it for free.  That's just me and things like that and the people I've gotten to meet doing things like that are part of what makes me who I am.  Many of you know I met my husband while taking part in a fundraiser for a professional organization.  What I said about community and service, Lee could have also written, with the exception of my nod to the adoption community.  I think he thinks we're all a little nuts. 

#3:  Family.
This doesn't really need much of an explanation, but family is at the center of service and community. I could say something fancy about the circles on the necklaces representing life...but I really just liked the look of circles and I liked the symetry. 

So...this is my necklace.  I'm not creative, except sometimes with my words and ideas.  The red white and blue crystals were Stacy's idea...but they look awesome.  It's a tangible thing I can hold in my hands and wear around my neck that is special to me and it represents who I am and what I hold dear. And maybe, with a little luck, this necklace will play a little part in bringing Kyle home this summer.  We make $12.00 off of each necklace.  $1,200.00 is roughly ten percent of what we still must pay, but instead of looking at that as a drop in the bucket, I look at it as "every little bit helps".  I hope we sell a ton.  I would love to walk around my community and see these little disks with these three little words etched on them. 

Here is the link to our necklace.  I love it.  I hope other people love it, too.  We're in a place in Kyle's adoption where all of the paperwork is done and we wait.  And the waiting isn't easy.  I thought it would be, the second time around, but it's not.  Seeing the link to Stacy's website with "my" necklace and my family's story was the kick I needed to have today. 

If you support us by buying one of our awesome necklaces, please tell me that you did so that we can tell you thank you.  Thanks, as always, for reading our story.

http://jubileesjewels.com/adoption-fundraising/service-family-community

On Adoption Fundraising

We have dipped our toes in to the waters of adoption fundraising.  We did not fundraise or apply for any sort of financial assistance with Zack’s adoption, other than the Military Adoption Reimbursement (to date, we are waiting 4+ months for our $2K, sigh). 

Back to back adoptions when at least one of us is on the doorstep of military retirement is causing a strain on our finances.  It is unfortunate that the cost of adoption is so daunting – I think more families who could easily afford to add more children day-to-day would adopt if the up-front money to actually get the child in to the home weren’t so high.  There are agency fees, government fees (on both sides of the globe), social worker fees, and travel fees...lots of fees.    

Between now and the time we bring Kyle home we will have to pay our agency (Wasatch International Adoptions) $12K.  This includes the $5.5K orphanage “donation” that we must pay to the orphanage that has been taking care of Kyle for the first three years of his life.  We do not have the option not to “donate” this money.  The $12K does not include our actual travel to get to and from China.  Plus, once we assume physical custody of Kyle, we are responsible for his travel costs, to include an expensive one-way ticket home.  Add to this is the fact that due to military service, we have to have a multi-leg journey home.  Kyle HAS to enter the U.S. in order to get his Certificate of Citizenship.  Once he’s entered the U.S., we have to come back to England because…well, that is where we live and work for now. 

We have created a fundraising profile on Adopt Together.  This gives others an opportunity to donate to our adoption in a tax deductible way.  Adopt Together gives the money directly to our agency, who deducts the amount from what we owe them. Here is the link to the profile if you want to check it out.

http://adopttogether.org/00294/

We have applied for one grant so far and are on a waiting list to hear something.  We are hopeful that we might get a little bit of assistance because it is a grant fund that is exclusively for military families.  We are in the process of applying for two other grants and for one “matching grant”.  The matching grant is dependent on our ability to raise money, which the organization will “match”.  If they approve us.  We hope to have all of our applications out by the end of April. 

In addition to grants and donations, I am selling Thirty-One gifts as a way to make a little extra money for adoption expenses, and you may see some other things you can buy to help support out adoption on this blog very soon.  We also have a “donate” button up top. 

So there you have it.  I’ve been on the fence on adoption fundraising in general for some time and we’ve taken the plunge.  In my two years in the International Adoption community, I’ve seen some entitled attitudes from some adopting families that have made me hesitant to go this route.  The “we leave in a week and we’re short $10K!  Give us money or little so-and-so will have to live in an orphanage and be without a family”.  Uh…no.  We have the ability to borrow and we’re taking this approach to fundraising early on in the hopes that any amount we’d have to borrow (or take from retirement savings) would be minimal.  Kyle will not stay in an orphanage one second longer than he has to.  As soon as China says “come and get him”, we’re there.  The “you drive a $40K car and you can’t contribute ten bucks to bring an orphan home” attitude kind of turns me off as well.  Actually…”kind of” doesn’t apply.  People have free will and what other families choose to spend their money on is none of my business.  Just like people do a double-take at “you’re spending how much on an international adoption.  That’s expensive!” 

So there you have it.  We’re working hard, trying to tap in to all of the resources we have available to us, and living within our means.  Raising our hands to say “we’ll accept some help” if someone wants to donate has been a little bit difficult.  Maybe it’s a pride thing.  But as a friend of mine said to me not very long ago – it’s not about your pride…it’s about Kyle.  And that’s true. 

The link to my Thirty-One page is on the left margin about half the way down.  My business email is Jill_Organize_Me@yahoo.com.  Contact me there (or leave a comment here) if you have any questions or order directly through my site.  The link to our profile on Adopt Together is here:  http://adopttogether.org/00294/

The Adopt Together homepage also has a great video that explains their really neat program.  So...a long post to make a simple announcement.  We're fundraising.  If you choose to support, my growing family appreciates whatever way you would choose to do that, even if that is simply moral support, good thoughts or prayers. 

On a separate subject, my blog just hit over 10 thousand views.  I am not sure if that is a lot or not.  It sounds like a lot to me.  So…whoever is out there looking at our adoption story, thank you for reading about our family.  And if you do support our adoptions – in whatever way that might be – we appreciate it and hope you’ve gotten something by reading our story. 

Happy Sunday!